Spoiled

What happens when your daddy has cancer and your mommy feels guilty that she has turned your life upside down and doesn't spend as much time with you? You are spoiled with gifts! Lucy has really adjusted well to all the changes in our lives this past month. She has been such a good girl. As a result I find that on the few outings we go on (especially during week one) I buy her things. I can't help it. Yesterday I raided the dollar aisle at Target because they had HSM things (Lucy is obsessed with High School Musical. She got such a positive reaction to singing one song from Aunt Becca and Katy that she has every song memorized now and carries the DVD around with her). She now has Troy pillowcases, bracelets, a notebook and a poster book. She carries them all in her purse with her.
Lucy also got her Halloween costume early and I'm letting her wear it. She loves her new Minnie dress-especially the brooch on the front.

Her favorite new toy is a Dora kitchen. A parent at mom's school donated it to the kindergarten but each teacher already has a little kitchen, so Mom mentioned that her little grandbaby's daddy has cancer and could she possibly take it home to buoy her spirits...? The kind mom had no problem and now Lucy is in heaven. She plays with as soon as she wakes up in the morning and reacts like she has never seen it before. I'm really proud of my girl and how she is dealing with everything. Thank heavens for the love of our family-she LOVES having her grandmas and grandpas around-and I do too.

Cycle 2 Day 1

Going Bald and End of Cycle 1

We are officially done with Cycle 1! Hooray! Earlier in the week Danny's hair really started falling out. After a couple days Danny got sick of having hair all over his pillowcase, hat, clothes and even falling into his food. We decided to just shave it all off and avoid the hassle of a slow fall-out. I think he looks very cute bald-and pretty tough too:) We took Lucy to barber shop and explained that Daddy was getting a hair cut. She got to watch them shave it off and she said that he looked like "Baba" (Grandpa). She is already used to the new look-while Danny still does double takes in the mirror.






I want to thank our good friend Jared who showed his love and support by shaving off his beautiful curly hair too! You look great!


On Friday we celebrated the end of Cycle 1 by going to the beach. Danny craves the ocean. He is pulled to it and has made me promise that we must always live within a few hours of the Pacific (or any other surfable ocean water). He still gets a bit too tired to surf at the moment, but just going to the beach got his ocean fill for the week. We drove to Saualito with Marilyn and Lindsay and had a fun lunch on the water and then drove out to Baker Beach in SF just north of the Golden Gate.
While there Danny and I sat on a towel on the beach to relax, well away from incoming tide. Danny laid down to close his eyes and I turned around to check on Lucy and Mom and all of a sudden we were covered in water! I sat there with water around my waist completely shocked that this crazy rogue wave had caught us all the way up the beach! I helped Danny up-he was soaked up to his armpits-and tried to rescue our stuff from drowning (Lucy was safe further up the beach with Grandma-we did check on her before saving our shoes:) Because we're overly protective of Danny's health we stripped him down right there so he wouldn't get a cold (we don't take our chances with old wives' tales) so he went home in our only dry towel (lucky Baker Beach is known to be a nudist beach, and we can report is still actively one...don't go too close to the bridge or else you'll be in for a surprise). We then came up with the joke that you "either come naked or Baker Beach will make you leave naked". We had a good time and it was good for Danny to feel the salt water on his skin again.

Relief Week

We have reached our first Relief Week! Danny has been feeling much better and really only needs to rest once during the day. He has been able to exercise and leave the house a lot more. On the first day he went to the park with us:


On Tuesday I celebrated my 26th birthday. Danny was pretty worn out but we got to go to a movie in the afternoon. It was so fun to get out just the two of us and do something fun. I had a wonderful birthday and was showered with love and gifts.

My new shoes from Danny

My big present: going to a So You Think You Can Dance concert!


Yesterday was Lindsay's album launch, which we have been looking forward to for ages-so it has been good to have something to prepare for. The concert was a huge success-Lindsay was amazing and we had a lot of fun sharing her music with our friends and family who could attend. Danny did a great job introducing her and then got to sit backstage to watch the performance. It was an incredible night and I'm so glad Danny was able to fully participate.

We got the CDs earlier in the week-it was an awesome moment. Lucy was feeding off the excitement and ran around with the album cover art the rest of the day. (check out Lindsay's website at lindsayaline.com)



Stay tuned for bald Danny pics...

Overview of the Week by Danny

What an interesting week. As most of you know, I have been taking
those White Blood Cell Booster Shots everyday for the last 5 days.
(Today was my last shot for cycle one!!! Yeah!) Each new thing
definitely brought with it its' own interesting side affects. In a
way each new side affect was kind of a relief compared to the one
before. It was almost refreshing to feel a different type of side
affect when it came on, just because it meant the other one was over.
That sounds kind of sick now that I say it, but it's the truth.

One night I felt like Wolverine except I'm a really disappointed that
I didn't at least get to have a metallic skeleton after the pain.
After that night of almost overdosing on Vicodin, we got a
prescription for a drug called oxycodon (or something like that),
which Luke informs me is related to heroin and as close as you can get
to an illegal narcotic. Pretty sweet huh! And yes, it is pretty sweet
feeling, especially after all that pain. It numbed my mind pretty
good though. That day all I seemed to want to do is watch tv, so I
watched 2 movies on tv, (Ray, and Training Day) and three 4th quarters
of preseason NFL (I'm definitely going to be a football junky during
this time). I took another oxy last night, but so far, I have been
able to have a pretty clear head and feel pretty good.

I also have a horrible soar throat, and the doctor informed me that I
have "thrush", (which to me sounds like they decided to put 'throat',
and 'rash', together for a clever word). So, we got a prescription
for a highly sophisticated potion called "Magic Mouthwash". It's a
pretty silly name for how hard it is to get and how long and
complicated it is for them to put together. It is some kind of
compound that they have to make and it took them all day yesterday.
You are supposed to swish and swallow. It basically numbs your mouth
so it is easier to eat with your mouth sores, etc. And I wish it would
numb my throat, but I guess it takes some time to get rid of the sore
throat. It hasn't held me back from eating too much it just hurts
like the dickens.

Something that has been fun to do is Christy has been reading to me
the, "Al Capone does my shirts", book out loud the last two nights.
It's a fun book and has been a fun thing to do together.

I downloaded the audio Book of Mormon the other day and it is a new
and enlightening experience to have it read to you. I was
particularly taken aback as I was listening to the Testimony of Joseph
Smith and what an absolutely remarkable story he has! The events of
the Restoration are absolutely amazing and incredible. I was so
amazed again at the fact that Joseph Smith saw God and Jesus Christ.
That he had those visits from Moroni, and all the other angels later
on. I was amazed and grateful at the restoration of the fullness of
the gospel through the Book of Mormon and other revelations, the
restoration of the priesthood and the true church of Christ. My life
has been so blessed by these things! What a remarkable and beautiful
thing it is!

I love you all. Hope you have a good Sunday.

Love. Danny.

Neopogen-take 2

Okay. So the shot is way worse then we previously expected. I try to keep this blog light-but for posterity's sake I have to document that "bone pain" can be freakishly painful. Danny was moaning in agony last night and I had to comment that now I know how he felt when I was in labor. It is hard to watch someone in pain. Thankfully he is taking some sweet drugs that are supposed to mostly take the pain away. Only one more shot this round...thank heavens.

Neupogen

This week has been great. We had our last chemo injection on Monday with minimal side effects. The rest of the week we get Neupogen shots-a shot in his arm that boosts his white blood cell count to keep him healthy. The cells are created in your bone marrow-which can prove painful when they're producing cells at such a quick rate. Your main bones-sternum, thigh bones, hips-get very achy. One woman described that she felt like she was a hundred years old because her bones hurt so badly. So far we have been lucky and he hasn't felt that bad-his chest hurts a bit. We are really looking forward to next week because it is relief week-his body will have a chance to bounce back. The nurse said that he'd feel perfectly normal by the last two days of relief week-before they started pounding him again:) Two days sounds good to me though! He is doing really well, the fatigue is probably the worst past of chemo so far. I wouldn't think that being tired could be so annoying-but he rests and sleeps and has no relief-he just feels tired consistently. Anyway, next week will be fun-we'll go out and celebrate. It is my birthday so I'll try and get him all to myself one day:) And because I have no pictures for this week-here is Lucy's first somersault:

While We Wait

Sample Infusion

As you can tell, Danny got the new iPhone 3G and is enjoying the video capabilities. We got it so he could record some of his chemo infusions-and just for the fun of it. You'll see more videos coming your way soon.

Day 8

One Week Down

(Part of a letter from Danny to our families-I thought it worked for the blog too. One day I'll get him to blog directly!)

One week down! (just some thoughts)

I can't believe it has been only a week since the eve before first
chemo. What a week it has been. Honestly, it didn't hit me until
this week that I actually had cancer. Doctors can tell you, and you
can sweat at night and be fatigued, and you can even see a bump
extrude from your neck, but until I felt that medicine trying to kill
me that first day, did I realize, "oh, I guess this is for real
then." Those were a rough couple of days for sure. But, the last few
have been so much better! The Lord seems to teach in many different
ways and methods, and using the human body as one of his methods is
becoming a very interesting lesson so far. It certainly increases
that yearning for the day when our bodies will be whole and perfect
and the awe at the feat.

I feel really blessed that I didn't have to take Procarbazine this
week. I am glad that we were able to gauge how sensitive my body is
to the drugs, so that I will be much better prepared to handle the
extra chemo drug next cycle. I am very grateful for the progress
medicine has made on anti-nausea! I don't think I could of handled it
with inferior drugs. They and the chemo drugs certainly wipe me out.
It's better than feeling nauseous all the time, but it just wipes me
and my appetite goes away and I don't want to drink much. Mom and
Christy have done such an awesome job of keeping me eating though!!
They are such champs!

These last two days though, have been a completely different story.
My Chemo drugs are seeming to leave my body and I have more energy and
more appetite! It's great. Last night Christy made her famous
homemade macaroni and cheese and I made some roasted beets and
carrots. I didn't know about the divine combination of homemade
macaroni and cheese and beets until Karen showed me. Now, I don't
think I can eat macaroni with out them. And, fresh roasted beets!!
Oh, man. It's delicious. The carrots were good too.

I also took a bunch of our apples from the tree out back and pre made
an apple pie (added blackberries to it too to sweeten it up because of
our more sour apples) and it is in the fridge ready to be cooked
today. I'm excited to taste an apple/blackberry pie. I've heard of
the combo but never tried it.

I am reading Neal A. Maxwell's book, "We Will Prove Them Herewith".
It is one of the best church books I have ever read. It really is
absolutely golden. Every paragraph is filled with pure inspiration
and told like only Elder Maxwell can. I got the book from Dad's
shelves of church books. It's one of those thin old hard backs that he
bought at the BYU Bookstore forever ago. It is definitely worth
getting if you can find it.

Love. Danny.


(At the pier in Martinez for a Sunday walk)
PS. Pie was VERY good!

An Interesting Side Effect

Danny has already experienced some of the gross side effects of chemotherapy, but the one that has surprised me the most is the hiccups. These aren't just ordinary hiccups, they're earth-shaking, ab-working, freakishly loud hiccups. He started getting them Day 2 and they were impossible to get rid of! He had them on and off all day. The night was the worst. The whole bed would shake and they were SO LOUD! I eventually couldn't take it anymore and slept on the couch. Danny told our nurses how annoying they were the next day and I expected them to give some suggestions for how to get rid of them; drinking water while standing on your head, holding your breath and swallowing three times, etc. Instead they whipped out a prescription! Who knew there was a prescription drug to get rid of the hiccups?! Crazy. (It works too:)

Beginning of Chemo!

We have officially started chemotherapy! Okay-let me start on Friday. Friday Danny had a Pulmonary scan to check his lungs because one of the chemo drugs can seriously effect your lung capabilities. That evening we had our first meeting with our oncologist since we were diagnosed. We learned that the bone marrow biopsy came back negative-so no cancer in his bones. He has been diagnosed at a Stage 2 B which has very high cure rates-so good news. Then our oncologist explained why we are getting the chemo treatment we are getting, which is called BEACOPP. It is an escalated chemo treatment that isn't very common in the USA yet, but with Danny's symptoms (night sweats, weight loss-they determine the "B" in his diagnosis) it is perfect. It has a 10-15% higher cure rate. It isn't common around here because it is expensive and harder on the body, but for a young guy like Danny-the benefits (%cure rate) beat out the disadvantanges. The possible long term side effects are infertility, heart problems and leukemia-the latter being the worst possible outcome. I'm feeling pretty bumbed about the possibility of infertility but I'm glad we're using this treatment-we'd rather only do this once and not have to fight the cancer again later. One Monday we started Day 1.

Our treatment center is really nice-it isn't a hospital and doesn't feel like one. They stuck what looked like a large tack into Danny's port and gave him his IV drugs through there. He got three chemo drugs and a premed cocktail (a steriod and anti-nausea medicine). We were there about four hours and then got to head home. Danny felt pretty awful the rest of the day. Nausea and fatigue are the biggest symptoms so far-but he was popping anti-nausea medicine like it was candy last night and nothing seemed to helped. We talked to the nurses over the phone and fortunately today they pulled out the big guns in anti-nausea medicine and he is dong a lot better. Our appointment today was only about two hours and tomorrow will be about them same. Then we get to enjoy several days of only oral chemo meds. While it has been rather miserable so far, we're feeling really glad that we're killing the cancer-Danny keeps imagining his cancer cells screaming in agony as he gets his treatments. Every once in awhile Danny will start making sound effects to some great battle with grenades exploding, guns blazing-we know that while the chemo isn't fun-it is doing its job. The cancer should be gone in the next two cycles, and greatly reduced by the end of this month-then we're just keeping it away for the next cycles until hopefully it can never return. He is much better today and we hope that is how things will stay. Hooray for modern medicine!
Day 1

Day 2